Let's Talk About SADNESS

Let's Talk About SADNESS

Moody Talk #1 SADNESSWords to Describe Sadness

This week's Moody Talk is the first of the Sadness series. November is the start of the holiday season which can be very emotional for many people. Thanksgiving is exactly what the word says - be grateful, give thanks for what you have.

But what if you don't feel grateful. Maybe you feel sad because you may have lost a loved one, your health has declined or maybe you lost your income. We grieve for what we have lost or what we never had. We can feel lonely - even even feel rejected.

This week's talk is about thinking about the words you have in your vocabulary that describe the emotion of Sadness. Not everyone has the same emotional thesaurus so it's good to write them down so that you can rate their intensity so that when the word pops into your head about how you are feeling, you understand how intense that word is for you. 


Sadness Words Sadness Scale

Empty Sadness Words Empty Sadness Scale

Moody Talk #2 SADNESS: Distracting with Wise Mind

In this week's Moody Talk, I unpack a lot of information about DBT's concepts around Wise Mind and Distracting ourselves from that raw feeling of Sadness, not matter the intensity.

First, we go through our Body Signals when we feel sadness. It's important to be aware of what kind of signals you receive so that you can figure out which emotion you are feeling. I also go through actions that we may do, such as Avoiding and Withdrawing - especially from your loved ones.

Then we talk about the concept of "Wise Mind" - the balance between the Reasonable Mind and the Emotion Mind.

Finally, there are a lot of ways in which you can Distract yourself - DBT uses an acronym called ACCEPTS. With all forms of skills sets, some work more than others for everyone. I go through each word in ACCEPTS with examples of how to use each coping skill.


Sadness #2 Worksheet 1 Sadness #2 Worksheet #2 Distracting with ACCEPTS

Moody Talk #3 Sadness: Mindfulness of Current Emotions

This week's Moody Talk on Sadness is about Mindfulness - what is Mindfulness? How do you practice it? And how does it play into emotions?

Although it can be so very uncomfortable, it's important for us to sit with the emotion we are feeling so that we can understand it, feel how it changes your body sensations and how long it lasts. For a fresh or intense feeling of sadness, it helps to notice these feelings so that we can stay with it and work through it. Sometimes it's difficult to do this, but it helps to have a beginning and end to that moment so we can move forward. We may still feel sad, but we have accepted it and learned to move forward once that moment has ended.

If you are feeling sad during this time of year, you are not alone. Many have trouble coping during the holiday season. If you need to talk with someone, please reach out to a mental health professional that you may know or call 988  - the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.


What is Mindfulness Mindfulness of Current Emotion

 Moody Talk #4 SADNESS: Radical Acceptance

Welcome to the 4th and final Moody Talk on Sadness. We cover another difficult but sometime very freeing concept - Radical Acceptance.

There are many philosophies on how to achieve Radical Acceptance. The first time I had heard of the concept was from spiritual mentor Tara Brach when I saw her at Kripalu (a yoga retreat center) in the Birkshires. Today we will discuss this through the DBT skillset.

In previous talks, we discussed descriptive words for sadness and their intensity as well as biological changes and mindfulness of your current emotion. Radical Acceptance uses these concepts to help to with accepting what you cannot change or fix.

We discuss what Radical Acceptance is and equally important - what Radical Acceptance is NOT.

If you are having a hard time through the holidays (and at any time) I hope you will reach out to a trusted loved one, your doctors or the 988 suicide text hotline. You are not alone. You are loved.


Radical Acceptance is Radical Acceptance is NOT